The Fight For James's Head
by Hypermon
Summary: James gets decapitated by accident and his head is taken on an interesting adventure. Warning, may contain graphic descriptions and gruesome situations..


I don't own pokemon.... What? were you expecting me to say something insane?

Now, the twisted mind of Hypermon presents:

THE FIGHT FOR JAMES'S HEAD!!!!

*not meant for people that are normal*

I am almost positive that you will think I'm either sick, weird, or I have been on too many drugs by the time you are done reading this fic! 

One day, Ash ,Brock, and Misty are visiting a boring, stupid town. Ash notices a Pokemon Gym and being the retard he is, he obviously goes inside. Meanwhile, Team Rocket is watching the twerps from a nearby house's rooftop.

"We have to find a way to steal that stupid electric rat!" screamed Meowth angrily.

"No, you think?" said James.

"How dare you insult me?!?!?!" Meowth cries. Then, with one quick swipe of his paws, Meowth instantly slices off James's head.

"Meowth!, now why did you have to go and do that? Now, our poor companion is dead", Jesse says rather calmly. Jesse stares at James's lifeless head. She watches it as his head rolls off the roof and bounces on the ground.

"Go and get James's head back, since you're the one that chopped it off!" Jesse says.

"No way, thats disgusting!" exclaims Meowth.

Jesse narrows her eyes in an evil way and then says, "Oh, well, he wasn't that important anyway..." With that, Jesse and Meowth leave to go and screw each other.(not really, it just sounded cool when i said that)

Meanwhile, a 5 year old boy has found James's head on the floor. He seems to think the head is some sort of a toy, so he brings it home. The mislead child plays with James's head. The boy braids James's head and puts his mother's lipstick on his lips. The boy has never had so much fun before. Then, one night, his mother comes into the boy's room while he is sleeping, and notices the mangled head. The mother is deeply traumatized and immediately throws the head in the garbage. When the boy wakes up, he notices that his prized head is gone and then commits suicide by smothering himself with a pillow.

James's head is now in the garbage, waiting to be picked up by the trash truck. The truck comes and takes the head to a huge, smelly dump. A slimeblob pokemon(grimer, is it?)picks James's head up and takes it to his little village of slimeblobs in the dump. The slime creatures seem to think that James's head is some sort of an ancient cherished relic from their ancestors. They clean his head up and dance around it every night in a funky ritual thing.

Then one day, Ash and his supposed friends stupidly walk into the slimeblob village. The slimes obviously aren't pleased with the intrusion because they think that Ash wants to steal James's head from them. The slimes attack Ash and his friends at full force. Ash sends out his Bulbasaur to attack the creatures back. Of course, if Ash would have properly studied pokemon, he'd know that Bulbasaur's attacks don't do shit in a snowstorm to the blobs.

Anyway, Ash tells his pokemon to use razor leaves attack. Unfortunately, the attack doesn't work at all. The blobs go and smother his Bulbasaur and it is now dead. Misty and Brock now try to escape the slimeblob village but they step on landmines and are blown to bloody little chunks of flesh.

Ash is very scared now so he sends out his Charizard. The dragon burns alot of the slime creatures to dust. The remaining ones are very scared because they can't let Ash get James's head! The little blobs all evolve to giant blobs with big arms(Muk, right?)Now the giant blobs can destroy Ash and his dumbass pokemon! Just as I predicted, the slime blobs kill off all of his pokemon except for pikachu.

"Pikachu, come here and use your thunderbolt!" Ash commands. Unfortunately the gay-ass rat is too scared and decides to run away while he is still alive. Now, since Ash has no more pokemon left, he starts to cry. The blobs can't stand his insistent crying, so they charge at him insanely. The blobs rip Ash's body apart very slowly and rather gruesomely too. All of Ash's body parts are disposed of in a clean, way, except of course for his head. The blobs place ash's head next to James's and they live happily ever after, dancing around the two people's heads.

Oh yea, pikachu later gets abducted by aliens, but thats another story still in the unpredictable mind of HYPERMON!!! the one and only, master of total insanity!!!!!!!

Hypermon: hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! I'm so insane. I amaze myself. If you are actually going to review this, don't tell me that I'm crazy and need help...because I already know that!!!! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!


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